Dear Ms. Leading,

I regret to inform you I've fallen out of lust.
It must be so hard to understand.
Did you really think me a fool enough to play along?
And make believing everything you said was true
Push your pouting lips on other unsuspecting lovers

Love,
The Dear Hunter

8.09.2009

"All I ever did was look up to you."

I'm not quite sure why, but some days are more difficult than others.
Maybe it's because I'm reminded of them through something.

"Tropic Thunder" was on HBO last night.
I don't remember who I saw it with or where I saw it.
But of course I'm reminded of them.
It's the quotes, the Ben Stiller attitude of "No one makes me bleed my own blood," (Dodgeball)
It's the fact that I can picture them and hear them.

And then I remember all of the good things and how they made me laugh.
Which is quickly followed by how much they made me cry and how hard it was to delete them out of my phone book... again, knowing it's the last time.
But I still remember their phone number because I had it memorized in 11th grade. I used to call them from my house phone in my room, laying on my bed laughing and missing them.
And then there's when I snuck out of drama practice to go make out with them.
And how I had to sneak past my co-actors to get to my after school bus because they thought I already went home for a dentist appointment.
And ice skating when you wouldn't hold my hand. So I cried.
And then the park and the "Spiderman" kiss. Then you broke up with me a week later.

Why am I even writing this?
I guess it kinda helped.

I have to keep pushing forward. I just hate that I have all of these memories and they mean quite a deal more to me than they ever meant to them.

"Bat your eyes, ball a fist and swing, swing, swing, swing... just swing."

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