Dear Ms. Leading,

I regret to inform you I've fallen out of lust.
It must be so hard to understand.
Did you really think me a fool enough to play along?
And make believing everything you said was true
Push your pouting lips on other unsuspecting lovers

Love,
The Dear Hunter

11.23.2009

"Biffles on beaches." - Baby Feet

He's been supportive of me for years.
Despite my shortcomings.
I'm trying to give back to him as much as I can.
But unfortunately, I can only give so much in this area.
His band is touring NY-TX in March and they need bones, bones and more bones.

Help me support my best friend.

11.20.2009

Acidic Hope

Rainbow paper hallucinogens,
It's what he calls salvation.

Money spent on an escape,
He never knows when to stop.
He doesn't value reality.

He asked for another chance.
He promised no more and he lied.
I couldn't be his rainbow.
I think he made me up in his head.

11.18.2009

"Me, I'm a fighter."

Lately, I feel like these songs are about me.
Some of these songs reminded people of me, and I'm not sure I'm okay with that.
These songs are all about... well, lonely and "broken" girls.
I refuse to be that.
I am not that.

"Knock 'Em Out" - Lily Allen (really for the line, "I have herpes," at the very end. haha)
"Thrash Unreal" - Against Me! (minus the drugs... well at least on my end.)


...oh wait. That last one actually is about me. Check Ghost Mall out (if you haven't already) and be amazed.

LTT, I Hate You, 143

Let's get high, spreading out on my kitchen floor
Across the days you knew my kisses so well you described them to me
and I'll forget everything you'll turn into tomorrow
Cigarette, stale breath, warm nights, cold feet
A moment's worth is never worth enough to me
Get this- you were the last thing I thought I'd miss
Dancing, laughing, loathing, jealousy
who is she?
who is she?
who is she?
Not me, never been
Our time is up
Will you miss me?

11.04.2009

Fruit Punch Juicy Juice

It's November and although the view from my apartment is beautiful, I am uninspired and, of course, anxious.
I still had a left over xaney bar from a friend so I took that to get some sleep last night.
Too bad I slept through the whole day because of it.

Empty. Cold. Uninterested.
Just... don't care.

It feels quite terrible to be up this late (or early?) and just not give a shit about anything.
It's depressing and lonely.
Do I have seasonal affect disorder?
I periodically pull away from people and hibernate this time of year and start to become difficult to be around.

At least there is someone in my life that doesn't know what I was like before.
And I don't have to tell them about it if I don't want to.
They'll spend 84 minutes on the phone with me and say that they miss me.
I can feel good for 84 minutes.

Sometimes, when I am awake at 4am, I hope that someone is also awake and thinking the same things... it makes me feel less alone.